
[Ed. note: Goodboys Nation weblog was recently given permission to listen in on a recent meeting involving The Great White Shank and his brain trust of most trusted advisors. For the sake of anonymity let’s call them Dirk, Big Eye, Jim, Jerome, Gaylord, Eustis, Doris, and Reg). Let’s listen in…]
TGWS: I’ve called this meeting because we need a plan going into 2015.
JEROME: The boss is right, a plan is exactly what we need.
JIM: Gotta have a plan.
EUSTIS: Nothing better than a solid workplan going forward, I always say.
BIG EYE: I’m with the boss on this. Let’s put a plan together.
DIRK: I think Doris should keep the minutes of this meeting.
DORIS: Why should I keep the minutes? I kept the minutes last time!
GAYLORD: I think Eustis should keep the minutes, he never does.
EUSTIS: I think Reg should keep the minutes, I don’t have a pen on me.
REG: I didn’t bring a pen, either.
DORIS: Neither did I.
DIRK: Gaylord, did you bring a pen?
GAYLORD: Er, uh, I had one here somewhere…
JIM: I have a pen. Let me call the roll.
TGWS: You idiots!! We don’t need to call a roll, we all know who we are and why we’re here. Besides, I want to hit balls sometime today. Here’s the problem we’re facing. I just got a call from the Callaway folks. They’re not just a little disappointed in how our 2014 year ended up, they’re pissed. They want to start seeing results and a return for their money. Frankly, I can’t blame them…
REG: Neither can I.
GAYLORD: Nor I.
EUSTIS: Nor I.
DIRK: Gotta hand it to those Callaway folks, they know a stinker when they see one.
JIM: Can’t throw bad money after good.
DORIS: Sometimes you gotta cut your losses.
BIG EYE: Damn straight, I’d drop us if I were them too.
TGWS: Whose side are you guys on?? Madre di Dios, I should drop my Callaway endorsement now.
BIG EYE: The boss is tossing in the towel.
JIM: Good idea.
REG: Best idea I’ve heard all day.
DORIS: I’ll draft the resignation letter.
GAYLORD: I can help Doris with that.
TGWS: Imbeciles! What’s the matter with you! I was just making a rhetorical point!
EUSTIS: Er, what point is that, Boss?
JIM: Yeah, boss – what are you getting at?
TGWS: I’m talking about all the work I put in last year and what did I do? Pull a Hindenberg at Goodboys Invitational weekend. All that work, and look at me – I’m still a 26.1 handicap, tied with “Possum” Shepter. Paul freakin’ Possum Shepter! Great guy, great Goodboy. But for gawdsakes, the dude only touches his clubs five times a year – and that includes Goodboys weekend!
GAYLORD: That Possum’s one hell of a golfer.
JIM: Ain’t more than a few like him in these parts, no sir.
JEROME: Can’t beat a fella who plays that good.
REG: Very efficient.
DIRK: Unbeatable.
EUSTIS: No way The Great White Shank gonna beat that Possum…
TGWS: What the hell you guys talking about! Why, you’re supposed to be my brain trust and my biggest supporters! What I want to know is, where do we go from here? As you know, my fitness instructor Tony has recommended major changes to my swing that, I have to admit, I’m kinda liking while still working out the kinks. So what are we going to tell my swing coach Alex Black? That I’m getting advice from a fitness instructor?
JIM: Always liked what that Tony was saying. Get athletic at address.
REG: Can’t be too athletic at address, what I always say.
DORIS: Being athletic at address is just what the doctor ordered.
GAYLORD: Yep, athleticism means more stability and flexibility.
EUSTIS: I’d listen to what Tony says.
TGWS: But a lot of what Alex says still makes sense, doesn’t it? And it’s not like I’m throwing out everything he’s taught me over the past two years, right?
DIRK: Alex is a good man. Lots of wisdom there, chief.
JIM: No need to throw out good advice, I always say.
EUSTIS: The Great White Shank and Alex Black are like two peas in a pod.
JEROME: Lots of good advice from Alex.
REG: If a PGA pro talks, you listen.
TGWS: Or maybe I ought to just take the best of what both Tony and Alex have recommended?
JIM: I was just saying, take the best of what both Alex and Tony have taught.
DIRK: Great idea, boss. I think you’re on the right track there.
BIG EYE: Take the best and leave the rest.
DORIS: Leave it to the boss to come up with the best ideas!
GAYLORD: Can’t argue with that. The boss is tops.
REG: None better.
JIM: That’s why he gets paid the big bucks.
TGWS: But what if Alex is wrong and Tony is right?
REG: Always thought Alex was trying to steer the boss wrong.
BIG EYE: No wonder the boss had such a bad year!
GAYLORD: All that formal golf instruction is overrated, anyways.
DORIS: A complete waste of time.
REG: Who’s going to tell the boss that?
TGWS: Jumpin’ Jehosaphat. You idiots! I’m right here in the room with you. I can hear what you’re all saying!
REG: That’s The Great White Shank, never afraid to take advice.
DORIS: Always willing to listen.
JIM: The boss is a great listener.
BIG EYE: Always willing to hear what the folks are saying.
JEROME: None better.
EUSTIS: No way, he’s the best.
BIG EYE: Can’t put anything past the boss.
TGWS: Oh for crying out loud! I’m going to hit balls.
EUSTIS: That’s the boss, totally dedicated.
GAYLORD: He’s the Bob Mann of Goodboys golf.
REG: No one works harder.
JIM: Love the boss’s work ethic.
DORIS: Anyone have the minutes to today’s meeting?
GAYLORD: I though Reg was going to take them.
REG: I thought Jerome was going to take them.
JEROME: I thought Big Eye was going to take them.
BIG EYE: Does anyone have the plan we plan we came up with?
EUSTIS: Nothing better than a solid workplan going forward, I always say.
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Pic Hat tip: My brother Dave. He’s a whiz!