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[Ed. Note: The second round of this weekend’s Goodboys Invitational will be played at The Ledges Golf Course in York, ME. Golf Channel’s Rich Lerner attempts to preview the course with the help of Goodboys Doug “The Great White Shank” Richard, Ben “The Funny Guy” Andrusaitis, Tony “2 Times” Proctor, Steve “Killer” Kowalski, Mike “Vegas” Clark, and Ron “Cubby” Myerow to show what the rest of the Goodboys can expect to find.]
RL: OK, gentlemen, let’s talk about Saturday’s venue, The Ledges. It will be “moving day” at the Goodboys, and after a Friday night roaming the Portsmouth bars I wonder just how many Goodboys will actually be moving come Saturday morning! Er, just a joke, fellas. This course is really going to force every Goodboy to play at his very best. (Dramatic pause) …The great Ben Hogan once said, “there are no shortcuts on the quest to perfection”…
TFG: …And the equally great Katy Perry once sang, “You change your mind like a girl changes clothes, yeah you PMS like a bi*ch I would know.” To me that’s just as relevant…
KILLER: Personally, TFG, I’m inspired by Rich’s Ben Hogan quote. Although, Katie Perry is a helluva lot cuter than Ben ever was…
TGWS: But can she swing a golf club?
VEGAS: She can swing my club any day.
RL: Gentleman, shall we get back to the business at hand? We’re talking about The Ledges G.C., site of the 2012 Goodboys Invitational’s second round.
CUBBY: Tough course.
2 TIMES: Especially when you’re begging for a drop on the very first hole after you hook it left onto the rocks. That (expletive deleted) Crusher [Ed. note Goodboy Jay “Crusher” Spielberg, TFG’s partner back in the 2010 Goodboys Invitational] can kiss by Goodboy butt.
TFG: Now, now, 2 Times, he was just asking, I wouldn’t call it begging…
2 TIMES: Hmmmph…
TFG: OK, he was begging.
KILLER: This course will challenge you in every facet of your game, but most especially you gotta get off the tee.
TGWS: Gulp…
VEGAS: The scenery is great. Tough course, great layout, well worth the dinero. The greens are fast, and you need to hit fairways because there’s not a lot of forgiveness if you stray.
TFG: It’s pretty hilly on almost every single hole. If you can get on the green in regulation then sneak away with a 2-putt consider yourself lucky. Find. Your. Game.
TGWS: The back nine is a killer, lots of precise shots needed there. My favorite hole on the course is the 19th – they have a really nice bar where you can sip a cold Sam Summer (or two) while watching the British Open. You almost hate to have to actually play golf.
KILLER: C’mon, Shank, don’t be a “gloomy Gus”, I don’t think it’s as hard as it looks. Play conservatively, keep it in the short grass and you’ll be OK. Except for holes 2, 3, 5, 6, 8, 10, 11, 12, 14, 15, 17, and 18, all of which will pose a particular challenge for all you high-handicappers out there.
2 TIMES: Speaking of handicaps, what’s mine this year?
POSSUM: Partner, don’t worry about your handicap. I’m going off at a 104, so the only question will be who’s playing for second.
RL: Who the (expletive deleted) is this guy?
POSSUM: I’m Paul “Possum” Shepter, 2 Times’ partner and the next Goodboys champion, that’s who!
CUBBY: Tough course.
RL: Their swagger might suggest that these Goodboys aren’t afraid of The Ledges, but like legendary Goodboy Steve “Gaylord” Perry once proclaimed, “Talk is cheap (and so am I)”. Money comes and money goes, but you can take it to the bank that The Ledges will show its significant teeth when the Goodboys tee it up just four days hence. And the team that is best able to tame this tiger of a course will find themselves in a great position come Sunday morning when the wide-open Pease Golf Course welcomes the Goodboys for Sunday’s final round. For Golf Channel and Goodboys Nation weblog, this is Rich Lerner saying, adios, muchachos!
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