February 22, 2011

OK, I’ll be honest with my audience here: you return from a weekend in Las Vegas and the world looks screwy. The women you see at the supermarket, at the bank, at WalMart – wherever – they just don’t look right – y’know, like the girls you’ve just spent a weekend looking at and being around. That’s not their fault (although, as far as I’m concerned, on the right frame you can’t have enough cleavage), it’s just the way it is. You can’t compare a cocktail waitress at, say, Wynn or The Peppermill with someone checking out the cabbage in the organic produce section. It just doesn’t work that way.

For those with their mouths agape, let me just say this: look, I may be married, but I’m not dead. I’m just a dumb red-blooded (and happily married) American guy who appreciates the finer things in life and all the possibilities God has given the female gender. And in Las Vegas you can’t help but notice them making the most out of what God (or modern surgical techniques) has blessed them with; I, for one, say good for them.

That being said, it’s a very very fine line between fantasy and reality. What Vegas does best is fantasy, and you have to understand that and dive right in with both eyes open. Those who can’t distinguish between the two are in for a heapin’ helping of trouble spelled T-R-O-U-B-L-E. And it’s not just Vegas – I mean, in any kind of doings in your private life you have to be really careful. Those who have a hard time with reality vs. fantasy are vulnerable: a few beers, a friendly girl, and all of a sudden, meltdown and media stories.

This is what happens when you don’t focus on the ladies and instead use a Worcester, Mass. strip club to sell narcotics:

Now for our perverse entertainment pleasure comes Easton “Boom Boom” Byfield, the manager of the Platinum Premier strip club on Southbridge Street. Released within the past few days, the online video shows the beefy Byfield locking a much smaller patron in the bathroom and calmly punching him in the face four times. The video also shows Byfield taking 300 bucks from the guy and making him drop to his knees. The incident took place last May.

It appears that Byfield suspected that the patron was selling drugs at the club. So rather than do the normal thing — kick him out or call the cops — Byfield proceeds to torture and humiliate the kid, 25, who is heard begging him to stop. He can be seen grinning for the camera seconds before he releases the first punch.

If you’re working as a stripper, that’s all well and good, but at least find someone to watch your kids:

A Riviera Beach woman has been charged with four counts of child neglect for allegedly leaving her children alone at night while she is at work as a stripper, according to Riviera Beach police.

Corinthian Williams, 24, whose occupation on the police report is listed as “stripper,” was arrested late Monday night. She was released from Palm Beach County Jail on Tuesday afternoon under her own supervision.

The state Department of Children & Families has taken custody of four children, ages 1, 5, 6 and 9, police said.

I mean, a girl’s gotta work for the money, but I’m not leaving a one-year old alone without an adult. C’mon!

Maybe the reproductive act in itself may not produce great results, but I doubt the idea that “Sex in space is tough” is going to stop folks from trying:

Researchers at the agency’s Ames Research Centre in California found that without effective shielding on spacecraft, powerful proton particles would probably sterilise any female embryo conceived in deep space

They also concluded that male fertility was likely to be negatively affected, with the particles damaging the sperm count.

Given that travel to distant planets is likely to take decades, centuries or longer, this could make any mission to colonise other environments a non-starter.

The scientists noted that space shield technology is currently not sufficiently advanced to offer enough protection from this type of radiation.

Dr Tore Straume, a radiation biophysicist at the centre, said: “The present shielding capabilities would probably preclude having a pregnancy transited to Mars.”

I’d be more concerned if they wouldn’t consider having a bar with cocktails to break the ice.

Of course, this could make a visit to Vegas a helluva lot more less interesting…

U.S. Sen. Harry Reid took aim at the world’s oldest profession Tuesday, telling state lawmakers the time has come to have an adult conversation about Nevada’s legal sex trade if the state hopes to succeed in the 21st century.

The Democratic Senate majority leader’s comments before a joint session of the Legislature came as owners, lobbyists and working girls for Nevada’s brothel industry looked on from the gallery.

Me, I’m split on this – the libertarian side of me says that what people want to do with their lives and their bodies is their own business, but the other side of me is well aware of the less-than-honorable elements that would inevitably come to be involved when it comes to exploitation and sex trafficking. The verdict: Harry Reid is a senile ass. But I already knew that.

Filed in: Uncategorized by The Great White Shank at 22:10 | Comments (4)
  1. That’s one way to increase your blog traffic. Just wait until the search engines find this post. 🙂

    Comment by Rob — February 23, 2011 @ 1:02 pm

  2. Doug:

    Sounds like Vegas was a good time.

    I should start saving.


    Comment by Ron "Cubby" Myerow — February 23, 2011 @ 4:16 pm

  3. Doug,
    Do you have the Ronettes cd/download? If not, I just downloaded it and can send you a copy. I have become a download/iTunes/Amazon convert. Able to find some really wonderful Lakota ceremony cd’s and Native American flute music.
    What I find so sad is the last time I was in a major book store, I asked for the Native American section. To my dismay, all there was a portion of two shelves. I find it appalling and sad that even the books have been put on a “reservation”.

    Comment by Jana — February 24, 2011 @ 5:59 am

  4. Sorry, all, for the delays in posting. This week at work is eating me alive.

    Rob – I never thought of that, that’s actually pretty funny….thanks for the laugh!

    Cubby – You’ve been saying that for years. Start putting those pennies away!

    Jana – I’ve got all the Ronettes I need from my Phil Spector “Back To Mono” collection (which is awesome, BTW), so thanks but I’m all set. Outside of grabbing a quick book or magzine at the airport, I haven’t been in a book store for years. I do all my shopping at Amazon. Hell, if I could make it work I’d do ALL shopping at Amazon. You can even buy your groceries there, but you’d still need to go to the market for produce, so I don’t. But Amazon (for books and music) and Napster have taken me places I could never have imagined.

    And it’s good for the local economy here – especially around Christmastime. Did you know Amazon has a 1 million sq. foot warehouse right here in Phoenix? It’s only open from Sept to Jan, and they employ 1,500 people at the height of the season. Pretty cool.

    Comment by The Great White Shank — February 24, 2011 @ 5:01 pm

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