Got this in an e-mail from my favorite aunt & uncle, some of these are pretty funny!

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1. Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more
about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across
a desk.
~Grantland Rice

2. Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how
childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent
inability to count past five.
~ John Updike

3. It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a
place the world is when one is playing golf.
~ Robert Lynd

4. If profanity had any influence on the flight of the ball,
the game of golf would be played far better than it is.
~ Horace G. Hutchinson

5. They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them. Golf
is more complicated than that.
~ Gardner Dickinson

6. If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork as poorly as
they do a golf club, they’d starve to death.
~Sam Snead

7. If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt.
~ Dean Martin

8. If you are going to throw a club, it is important to
throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don’t
have to waste energy going back to pick it up.
~Tommy Bolt

9. Man blames fate for all other accidents, but feels
personally responsible when he makes a hole-in-one.
~ Bishop Sheen

10. I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew
tomatoes, they’d come up sliced.
~ Arnold Palmer

11. My handicap? Woods and irons.
~Chris Codiroli

12. I’m hitting the woods just great, but having a
terrible time getting out of them!
~ Buddy Hackett

13. The only time my prayers are never answered
is playing golf.
~Billy Graham

14. If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try
picking up the wrong golf ball.
~ Jack Lemmon

15. It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf
balls while they are still rolling.
~ Mark Twain

16. May thy ball lie in green pastures, and not in still waters.
~Ben Hogan

17. The difference in golf and government is that in golf you
can’t improve your lie.
~ George Deukmejian

AND FINALLY……………

18. Golf is a game invented by the same people who think
music comes out of a bagpipe.
~Lee Trevino

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Pool temp: 58 degrees