Greetings, Goodboys Nation weblog fanatics! Troy Donahue here. The Great White Shank has, in the vernacular of The Funny Guy (he’s the one with the horns), “Gone Mustang”, leaving me here to tend the roost.

I know what you’re thinking – why is some dead Hollywood has-been manning the command post of some earnest, yet innocuous blog out here on the blogsphere equivalent of Indian territory? Well, first of all, it’s not as if I’m a stranger to these parts. Second of all, The Great White Shank has a soft spot for has-beens. So what to write about to fill this space? How ’bout this:

Was this a great ’90s song or what? Primitive Radio Gods’ “Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth with Money in My Hand”. Heh. As The Great White Shank is wont to say, crank it up!

Back in my day, Bewitched‘s Elizabeth Montgomery was a fox.

I know TGWS is gonna find this pretty cool. I guarantee you’ll never see Michelle Obama straddlin’ a hog.

I Want Revenge may be the early favorite for this Saturday’s Kentucky Derby, but I know from his bookie that TGWS is still undecided – he loves both Dunkirk (4-1) and Atomic Rain (50-1). Why Atomic Rain, you ask? I know TGWS loves to post about hopeless causes.

John Blakeley is an extremely underrated guitarist. Just check out “Wingnut’s Theme” here, or “Road 101” or “The Way Outside” here.

Whoa! I just got a call from TGWS – he tells me to make sure I post that he’s against disestablishmentarianism. Me? I’ve always favored eclecticism in a world of dogmatism.

I always thought Boaz Walton Long never got enough credit for his work as ambassador to Ecuador back in 1943. Hmm…maybe he did – after all, he became ambassador to Guatemala the very next year. Or maybe it was a demotion?

The Great White Shank just phoned in again – he tells me he hopes Julio Lugo never darkens the dirt at shortstop for the Sox ever again.

And speaking of chicken, I’ve always thought thighs are a heckuva lot easier to cook and are tastier no matter how you do them than breasts. If you’re looking for decent breasts… uh, never mind…

Things to contemplate this last night of spring – tomorrow begins that stretch of 90+ degree days where there will be no turning back temperature-wise until the heat breaks around the second week of October. It’s been a fairly “cool” spring; maybe this summer won’t be as bad….

I don’t know about anyone else, and maybe I’m just sticking my head in the sand, but I’m not losing any sleep over this swine flu thing.

Just another example of how the Obama White House is being run by amateurs. I’ll say it once again – if this had happened under President Bush you wouldn’t be able to hear yourself above the caterwalling of the media. But since it’s Obama, and he obviously can’t do anything wrong, not a peep….

Osama bin Laden – dead or not? Sounds pretty definite to me – er, no matter which way it goes. So that’s what goes for “military intelligence” Pakistani-style nowadays…

How about those Red Sox? And I have to say, that steal home by Jacoby Ellsbury Sunday night against the Yankees was one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen done on a baseball diamond.

Came today in the mail: Mark Levin’s “Liberty and Tyranny – A Conservative Manifesto”. Everyone’s talking about it, can’t wait to crack it open.

And checking out my recommendations at Amazon.com, this sounds like a great listen. Too bad it doesn’t feature this great cut. Turn off your pop-up blocker for a spell and crank it up!

Most certainly it’s still April, but you have to like the way the Boston Red Sox are playing baseball right now. They’ve now won ten straight, including a memorable 9-game homestand where a weekend sweep of the evil Bronx Bombers followed similar efforts against the Orioles and the Twins.

The good? There’s a lot to be said for the good guys.

1. Offensively they’re winning desite the fact that DH David Ortiz (who may never hit another home run ever again) and reigning MVP Dustin Pedroia (The Great White Shank’s favorite BoSox) have yet to start hitting. The bad? How do we know that Ortiz will ever hit for power this year. And I’m not convinced that third baseman Mike Lowell – currently the American League’s RBI leader – will be able to stay healthy enough to withstand the rigors of a full baseball season. If he can’t, the Sox are in trouble.

2. Defensively the team seems pretty rock-solid. Lowell has lost a little mobility on balls hit low and to his left, but otherwise the infield and outfield defense has been outstanding. It will be interesting to see how shortstop Julio Lugo fares in his return from injury: his defense has always given me the heebie-jeebies, but I’m willing to give him a chance – especially since this team needs all the offensive help it can get.

3. I love this team’s pitching. The starting rotation – even with Daisuke Matsuzaka on the DL – remains one of the best in baseball, and the bullpen has, by and large, been pretty rock solid. Keep in mind that with this year’s edition of the Red Sox you have to consider three critical aspects: the major league team, the Pawtucket AAA farm team, and what’s going down in extended spring training in Florida. The depth of this year’s team has already shown its potential in the Yankees series just completed – any time you can bring up from AAA the likes of a Hunter Jones or Michael Bowden while leaving behind the likes of Clay Buchholz and Daniel Bard behind, that’s evidence of the depth this team has. And that doesn’t even take into consideration the fact that future Hall-of-Famer John Smoltz, currently rehabbing in Florida, will be joining the team on or around June 1.

The bad: David Ortiz and Mike Lowell’s durability.

Bottom line: this is a team that is slowly and gradually coming together to build a new identity, one that needed to be carved out following Manny Ramirez’s stormy tenure and departure. And this new identity has everything to do preparing the team for the post-season. The Red Sox front office has done a good job making sure that if there are any holes that need to be filled come July 31 the team has plenty of strength to trade from and financial wiggle-room to work with.

Now comes a brutal 9-game road trip against the Indians, the Rays, and the Yankees. Methinks we’ll have a better idea as to where the Sox truly are by the time they return home on May 7.

Jason Bay hits a game-tying 2-run homer off The Fruitbat in the 9th inning, then Kevin Youkilis closes the deal with a walk-off, 11th-inning homer to take the first of a three game series with the dreaded Evil Empire. I love the Red Sox-Yankee games for the sheer drama each game seems to bring. These two teams are so evenly matched, it always seems to come down to the later innings, bringing out the best baseball can offer.

Not to mention the sheer joy of calling my mom after she’s gone to bed to tell her that the Red Sox have beaten the Yanks!

Or taking a late-night swim in a 89-degree pool afterwards to celebrate another Red Sox late-inning triumph over the Bronx Bombers!

7:15 PM. The air temperature is 92 degrees; the pool temperature 79.5. The pineapple lights bathe the patio in a soft, happy yellow light. My workday isn’t finished yet – I’ve got still two India calls to get through, and there’s a bug in my glass of Pinot Grigio I feel compelled to rescue.

I’m not afraid to admit it – I’m swishing around in the water as the dusk starts to close in all around me, and tonight I’m feeling that darkness in a different way than I’m accustomed to. The demons have returned in a big way, and I’m feeling disoriented and lost – spritually, physically, mentally.

I’ve got the Tropical Breezes mp3 going and Jimmy Buffett’s rendition of Bruce Cockburn’s marvelous “Pacing The Cage” comes on, and I can only think about how Cockburn’s lyrics absolutely nail the way I’m feeling tonight – not just in my own wayward walk with God, but everything in my life right now. Call it from my stereo speakers to God’s ears:

Sunset is an angel weeping
Holding out a bloody sword
No matter how I squint I cannot
Make out what it’s pointing toward
Sometimes you feel like you’ve lived too long, the days drip slowly on the page
And you catch yourself
Pacing the cage

I’ve proved who I am so many times,
The magnetic strip’s worn thin
And each time I was someone else
And everyone was taken in.
Powers chatter in high places
Stir up eddies in the dust of rage
Set me to pacing the cage.

I never knew what you all wanted
So I gave you everything.
All that I could pillage
All the spells that I could sing
It’s as if the thing were written
In the constitution of the age
Sooner or later you’ll wind up
Pacing the cage

Sometimes the best map will not guide you
You can’t see what’s round the bend.
Sometimes the road leads through dark places
Sometimes the darkness is your friend.
Today these eyes scan bleached-out land,
For the coming of the outbound stage.
Pacing the cage.

Dark places. Darkness. Outbound stage. Abandonment. The Cross – it’s always there. But tonight it’s more than that, it’s all-encompassing, in my brain, my blood, my bones. I not only can’t shake it, I don’t want to shake it. So I embrace the darkness.

I truly wish there were some outbound stage, but I know the ticket I’d want to have punched for ain’t a destination that exists. It’s a place called “Peace With Yourself”, and it’s a location I know I’ll go to my grave never finding. Why? Who knows – maybe it’s just the way the genes are organized, or the brain is wired. Either way, it’s an all too familiar place I find myself trapped in, one I’ve grown all too accustomed to. Talk about the darkness being your friend…

Brian Wilson knew this place all too well – that’s where the marvelous Pet Sounds. Just goes to show how you can have what seems from the outside to be everything anyone would ever want in life and still find yourself unable to escape whatever darkness it is that either exists or that you make for yourself.

Phew. I’m glad the next song that comes on is Alan Jackson’s “It’s Five O’Clock Somewhere”. Guess your mp3 player is like your life, you just move on…

Bailouts, bailouts, bailouts. The fallout continues…

GM to close its U.S. plants for the summer. I’m so glad my tax money from last fall went to such good use.

Ditto the financial geniuses at Morgan Stanley.

This is a laugh… John Kerry wants to rescue the nation’s troubled newspapers – like his Boston Globe – for the sake of diversity:

“America’s newspapers are struggling to survive, and while there will be serious consequences in terms of the lives and financial security of the employees involved, including hundreds at the Globe, there will also be serious consequences for our democracy where diversity of opinion and strong debate are paramount,” Mr. Kerry said.

Only a Massachusetts senator could utter such words with a straight face. The Boston Globe has stood for a lot of things over the years, but “diversity of opinion” and “strong debate” are hardly one (or two) of them.

Freddie Mac’s CFO commits suicide. I’m no conspiracy theorist, but it sure makes you wonder what he saw coming down the line.

Is TARP nothing more than a criminal enterprise in disguise? It is when your Treasury Department hasn’t got a clue as to where or how money we don’t even have is being spent, or even how much is even left in the kitty. Larry Kudlow – as sharp an observer of all things finance as anyone – believes as much (my boldings):

Listen to this: [U.S. Special Inspector General Neil] Barofsky’s investigators reported Monday that they have opened 20 criminal probes into possible securities fraud, tax-law violations, insider-trading, and mortgage-modification fraud related to TARP. Yup, those are criminal probes. Barofsky is the special IG overseeing the bailout program. And for some reason the mainstream media refuses to report this on the front pages where it belongs.

I guarantee if this were a Republican administration this would be splashed all over the mainstream dino-media and 24-hour cable channels. But since we have the first African-American president in the White House and he’s a genius and “The One” who has come to Washington to cure every ill that was ever wrong with America (if only those racist homophobe conservatives and Republicans would just step aside and let him do his thing), you’ll never hear a thing about it. The Obama suck-ups in the media would rather focus on truly critical issues – you know, like waterboarding terrorists and Meghan McCain’s attempt to remake the Republican party in her own image.

Sigh. Maybe it’s just me, but I just get the sense that a lot of things are unraveling before our very eyes. Makes me so glad we have an experienced and sure-handed defender of America and its values in charge of the ship.

“Summertime, and the living is easy.
Knowing we’ve got six more months of this is making me queasy…
— E.P. Hemingway

One look at the five-day forecast tells you all you need to know – summer has arrived in the Valley of the Sun. The pool is 76 and hurtling towards 80 (that will feel nice – especially when in a month it’ll be over 90!), the air is filled with the romantic sounds of A/C units turning off and on, and the crickets are a’chirpin’.

You know the heat has arrived when you step out on the patio at 7 PM and the cement still feels warm to the feet. That’s OK, it is what it is. I look forward to pool season because it’s the only time of year I get any exercise around here. Back-stroking my way from one end of the pool to the other and playing lifeguard to unfortunate ants and other insects that find their way into Davy Jones’ locker brings me great joy and a sense of relaxation.

So Summer it is. A glass of Pinot Grigio, Caribbean music on the MP3, a pool surrounded by fragrant flowers of every color, a St. Francis statue on one side, a Buddha on the other (just to make sure all my spiritual bases are covered). I mean, how can you beat that?

Even though I make my living in IT, there are still times when the things you can do over the Internet amaze me. Take today, for instance. It just so happens that my wife’s twin sister once again finds herself living at a women’s shelter in Florida (you know, that sun-shiney state for shady people) for what seems like the 1,734th time after her latest go-round with a former husband she just can’t seem to break away from.

So yesterday when we got that frantic call from Tam, I asked her what her immediate needs were and she replied food and cigarettes. Seems she was OK for now – some of the other residents were sharing their food with her – but that wasn’t a situation that was going to remain tolerable for long. And so another Gilbert, AZ-initiated version of the Berlin Airlift was needed, and pronto.

In the past, this would involve a trip to the local supermarket, buying a whole bunch of stuff, then dropping it off at the local UPS Store (one of my absolute favorite places to go, BTW), where our groceries would be packaged up and shipped to her. But not today. It was Tracey who got the idea of doing everything over the ‘Net – after all, we just spent this week doing our taxes and paying them online, why not try grocery shopping?

So Tracey found AULSuperStore for all her grocery needs. I think she’s hooked. No getting dressed, hopping in your car, wheeling a shopping cart around, and waiting in line to be checked out. Just grocery shopping in the comfort of her own home. Now granted, you probably wouldn’t want to do this for your everyday shopping – after all, you still have to be able to buy perishable items – but considering the circumstances a wonderful way to get what you need done without all the hassle. The shipping and handling charges were even reasonable.

Same thing with Tam’s cigarettes. After checking a bunch of websites (not being a smoker, I was amazed at how many there were!) Tracey settled on this smoke shop run by the Seneca Indians of upstate New York. While this online commerce isn’t quite as straight-forward as the groceries were (after all, there are a whole slew of regulations associated with purchasing tobacco products) she nevertheless still found great deals you would never find at your local supermarket or convenience store. Again, all without the hassle of traveling – perfect for people like Tracey who prefers rabbits to people and spending her free time relaxing around the house.

What a marvelous technologically-advanced age we live in.

Great lyrics from Chris Isaak – it’s a great song from the “Tin Cup” soundtrack, and it kinda sums up the way I feel tonight. Seems that lots of self-doubt that have creeped in from somewhere, who knows? Fabulous lyrics anyways…

When I was younger I believed, that dreams came true
Now I wonder
‘Cause I’ve seen much more dark skies than blue
Now I wonder

I keep on praying for a blue sky, I keep on searching through the rain
I keep on thinking of the good times, will they ever come again?
Now I wonder
Now I wonder

I keep on praying for a blue sky, I keep on searching through the rain
I keep on thinking of the good times, will they ever come again?
Now I wonder
Now I wonder

When I was younger I believed, that I could win
Now I wonder
There was a time when you and I walked hand in hand
Now I wonder

I keep on searching for the old me, I keep on thinking I can change
I keep on hoping for a new day, will I ever feel the same?
Now I wonder
Now I wonder

If yowant to hear what this great song sounds like, click here.

Have you seen this video? Believe it or not, more than 20 million – I repeat, million people across the world have watched it, or variations of it, in just the past few days. Susan Boyle, a 47-year old aspiring singer, wows the crowd on last Saturday’s evening’s edition of “Britain’s Got Talent” (the original idea behind our “American Idol”).

Many people commenting say her performance brought them to tears, and I’ll admit I’m one of them. Not only is her performance of “I Dreamed A Dream” from Les Miserables flawless, watching the judges respond as her performance unfolds is an amazing thing to behold as well.

Enjoy. I’m sure you’ll find this amazing too.

And if that’s not enough for ya, check this out as well. I’ll tell you, Susan Boyle is my kind of singer.

Exit question: Considering her performance last Saturday was only the first round of this year’s “Britian’s Got Talent”, think she can hold on to win the whole enchilada with all this attention bestowed upon her?