Liked the previous post on golf tips and wisdom, courtesy of fellow Goodboy Mike “Vegas” Clark? Here’s a few more:

* If you want to hit a 7 iron as far as Tiger Woods does, simply try to lay up just short of a water hazard.

* To calculate the speed of a player’s downswing, multiply the speed of his back-swing by his handicap; i.e., back-swing 20 mph, handicap 15, downswing 300 mph.

* There are two things you can learn by stopping your back-swing at the top and checking the position of your hands: how many hands you have, and which one is wearing the glove.

* (A basic truth about The Great White Shank’s game) Hazards attract, fairways repel.

* You can put a draw on the ball, you can put a fade on the ball, but no golfer can put a straight on the ball.

* A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours.

* If there is a ball on the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker; if both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint.

* It’s easier to get up at 6:00 AM to play golf than at 10:00 to mow the yard.

* Sometimes it seems as though your cup moveth over.

* A good drive on the 18th hole has stopped many a golfer from giving up the game.

* Golf is the perfect thing to do on Sunday because you always end up having to pray a lot.

* A good golf partner is one who’s always slightly worse than you are…that’s why I get so many calls to play with friends.

* That rake by the sand trap is there for golfers who feel guilty about skipping out on lawn work.

* If there’s a storm rolling in, you’ll be having the game of your life.

* Golf balls are like eggs. They’re white. They’re sold by the dozen. And you need to buy fresh ones each week.

* A pro-shop gets its name from the fact that you have to have the income of a professional golfer to buy anything in there.

* It’s amazing how a golfer who never helps out around the house will replace his divots, repair his ball marks, and rake his sand traps.

* (Fellow Goodboy Jay “Crusher” Spielberg truism): If your opponent has trouble remembering whether he shot a six or a seven, he probably shot an eight.

* You probably wouldn’t look good in a green jacket anyway! A sweatshirt will do just fine.

* It takes longer to learn to be a good golfer than it does to become a brain surgeon. On the other hand, you don’t get to ride around on a cart, drink beer, eat hot dogs, and pass gas if you are performing brain surgery.