August 1, 2006

Rich Lerner
Hi! Rich Lerner of The Golf Channel here. You can probably tell by my incessant (some would say annoying) sunny personality that nothing – and I mean NOTHING – gets me down, no matter what life’s trials and tribulations might bring. Dog eats my hard copy two minutes before I go live with the latest tournament human-interest story? No big deal. Arnie tells me to shut my yap ’cause he’s sick of hearing me refer to him as “golf’s golden statesman”? I’m singin’ in the rain, baby. Like I say, nothing gets me down.

Nothing, that is, until I found out yesterday that the Boston Red Sox and their erstwhile genius GM Theo Epstein were unable to consumate any meaningful last-minute trading deadline deals yesterday. Zero. Nada. Zilch. Nothing. And this not only makes me very, very, VERY sad, but like my good friend The Great White Shank, absolutely white with anger. The standings may say they’re in first place by a game, but I’m telling all you card-carrying members of Red Sox Nation that the season is lost. The thermometer may read 90 degrees and the calendar may say there’s two full months of baseball left to be played, but for all intents and purposes it might as well be 35 degrees and November 16th, ’cause this baseball season is O-V-E-R.

I know what you’re thinking: Rich, you’re as off-target as a crucial Michelle Wie approach shot at crunch time. Sure, sure, Baseball-God-On-Earth Big Papi smacked another game-winner last night, but look-see who the cat dragged in to pitch tonight’s game – Jason Johnson. Yes, the immortal Jason Johnson. And now comes word that the Sox have virtually given up on Matt Clement as a useful commodity for the rest of the season. Excuse me, but after watching Boomer Wells live up to his nickname from all the moonshots he gave up last night, Matt Clement sounds pretty good to me right now! And now Trot’s gone for his annual 3-week stay on the DL that will undoubtedly stretch out to 6-8 weeks (or more), the Captain’s down with a bad knee, meaning Doug Mirabelli‘s now starting catcher for a week or more, and – I can’t believe I’m actually writing this – Julian Tavarez and Rudy Seanez are still on the roster!

The Sox are toast.

Wake up Theo! For Gawdsakes, the Yankees were able to filled every-single-freakin’-hole they had on their team, and you (supposedly) decide that Jon Lester is too valuable for the Sox to give up, even if the target was the Astros’ Roy Oswalt via los Bravos’ Andruw Jones? Sheer stupidity. I mean, sure Lester’s got promise without a doubt, but if there is any way I can get a perennial 19-game winner on my staff to compliment Schilling and Beckett in a year where the Yankees are vulnerable and there’s no guarantee the wild card is coming out of the A.L. East, me – I’ve got to pull the trigger.

Seeing the Red Sox come up as empty as the content of a Tina Cervasio question during a “Terry’s Take” interview on a day when they were supposed to load up for the long, hard road ahead is almost enough to wipe this smile off my face. Within a week the Sox will be 3.5 games behind the Yankees and sinking faster than Cynthia McKinney (D-Moonbat) ‘s chances during next Tuesday’s 4th Congressional District (GA) run-off. Maybe I’m just infected by The Great White Shank’s pessimism, but even someone as sickeningly sunny as me just don’t see anything good on the Good Ship Francona’s horizon but a big, fat, jagged iceberg. I (we) believed in Theo. He’s let us down, and big time.

When to the pitchers and catchers report to Ft. Myers?

Filed in: Golf & Sports by The Great White Shank at 14:50 | Comments Off on All Hope Is Lost
No Comments

No comments yet.

RSS feed for comments on this post.

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.


Search The Site

Recent Items


September 2021
April 2021
January 2021
December 2020
November 2020
October 2020
September 2020
August 2020
July 2020
June 2020
May 2020
April 2020
March 2020
February 2020
January 2020
December 2019
November 2019
October 2019
September 2019
August 2019
July 2019
June 2019
May 2019
April 2019
March 2019
February 2019
January 2019
December 2018
November 2018
October 2018
September 2018
August 2018
July 2018
June 2018
May 2018
April 2018
March 2018
February 2018
January 2018
December 2017
November 2017
October 2017
September 2017
August 2017
July 2017
June 2017
May 2017
April 2017
March 2017
February 2017
January 2017
December 2016
November 2016
October 2016
September 2016
August 2016
July 2016
June 2016
May 2016
April 2016
March 2016
February 2016
January 2016
December 2015
November 2015
October 2015
September 2015
August 2015
July 2015
June 2015
May 2015
April 2015
March 2015
February 2015
January 2015
December 2014
November 2014
October 2014
September 2014
August 2014
July 2014
June 2014
May 2014
April 2014
March 2014
February 2014
January 2014
December 2013
November 2013
October 2013
September 2013
August 2013
July 2013
June 2013
May 2013
April 2013
March 2013
February 2013
January 2013
December 2012
November 2012
October 2012
September 2012
August 2012
July 2012
June 2012
May 2012
April 2012
March 2012
February 2012
January 2012
December 2011
November 2011
October 2011
September 2011
August 2011
July 2011
June 2011
May 2011
April 2011
March 2011
February 2011
January 2011
December 2010
November 2010
October 2010
September 2010
August 2010
July 2010
June 2010
May 2010
April 2010
March 2010
February 2010
January 2010
December 2009
November 2009
October 2009
September 2009
August 2009
July 2009
June 2009
May 2009
April 2009
March 2009
February 2009
January 2009
December 2008
November 2008
October 2008
September 2008
August 2008
July 2008
June 2008
May 2008
April 2008
March 2008
February 2008
January 2008
December 2007
November 2007
October 2007
September 2007
August 2007
July 2007
June 2007
May 2007
April 2007
March 2007
February 2007
January 2007
December 2006
November 2006
October 2006
September 2006
August 2006
July 2006
June 2006
May 2006
April 2006
March 2006
February 2006
January 2006



4 Goodboys Only

Site Info